The Wolf and the Eagle

I watch with interest to the current news story of that bloke Wolfowitz who has resigned from the World Bank. I like it when bad bosses get found out and paraded in front of us for public humiliation. If you haven’t been following it then click on the linky:

Paul Wolfowitz

It appears that aside from his indiscretionary dealings in getting his girlfriend a promotion and pay-rise, the reason for his actual downfall was that no-one he worked with liked him very much, so were unprepared to stand by him when the shit hit the fan. In fact he was a terrible, overbearing and arrogant boss. And we’re not just talking a lot of whinging minions under his employ idly bitching by the watercooler for sport, we’re talking, top of their field intellectuals who have chosen to use their financial skills to help manage third world debt and poverty. Clever types that know numbers and stuff; that sort.

Wolfowitz was on Radio 4’s Today programme yesterday as well as one of the former management team who has left the World Bank whilst he was in tenure there. Just ten minutes worth of interviews with both and it was easy to see why Wolfowitz was hated. He came across as arrogant, unapologetic and disdainful of his colleagues. The other guy was restrained in his description of Wolfowitz but clearly delighted at his downfall.

We’ve all worked with that type haven’t we? The Wolfowitz story reminded me of a couple of gits I have worked with and in particular I dwelled on one particular git who was hoisted back into my conscious mind a few months ago. I keep in touch with a few people I used to work with in a company I have now left for over 6 years. We were a nice bunch, we got on well, did a few good projects, we worked hard and all but one of us has now moved on to better things. Including the main reason we all left; the manager of our department. We’ll call him “The Bald Eagle”, for that was his name and it seems he has left too. Here he is:

As far as I could tell from the gossip, one of the Bald Eagle’s lousy business decisions had finally made so much of a financial mess that he was unable to hide it and his own inadequacies from the MD (oh, he’s another blog all together…just wait for that one!). He was sacked!

Hooray”, I shouted. “They’ve finally found him out!”

Might they perhaps start calling round all the decent people who got sick of this bloke and decided to leave because of him, and apologise to them? Perhaps even offer some kind of compensation for messing up their careers momentarily? No, of course not- life isn’t like that. They’ll just employ another git like him and the process will begin all over again.

Time after time, we’d be forced into working on one of the Bald Eagle’s hairbrained, ill- thought-through schemes that would eventually lose the company money. Except by the time it lost the company money the hairbrained, ill- thought-through project would be our fault. If any of his schemes worked, I have it on good authority that profits would be skimmed off into Bald Eagle’s personal pocket.

But I reckon many of you can recognise the type; the buck-passer, the type of guy who would receive emails asking them to do stuff and they will instinctively reach for the “FORWARD” button on their email and send it onto someone else with no attached email either asking for help, or acknowledging that this was anything to do with them in the first place. The shit ducker, the management butt kisser and the tyrant who couldn't handle the responsibility when anything went wrong and blamed those in his department.

He was also one of those “let’s get our ducks in a line” Jargon Wankers. We used to play “Jargon Bingo*” at any of the meetings he held. See below for rules.

So a couple of weeks ago someone I used to work with emails me a link. His email is entitled “Bald Eagle Rises from Ashes” and there he is; the flipping Bald Eagle in the paper getting some press (always with his picture in! Vain git- though god knows why…) about the new company that someone’s employed him to trash. Plus ça change!

Thing is the Eagle looks the part, he can talk enough bollocks to convince people he knows what he’s talking about. It takes time to realise that underneath he is woefully incompent, thick, crap at his job and a complete coward. Word is that when he got sacked, rather than the MD phoning ex-employees up and apologising to them as I have suggested, the Eagle was calling ex-employees up and asking them if they knew of any job opportunities for him. Why didn’t he call me? Why? I’d have LOVED that! Denied!!!!

So if the Bald Eagle can rise again you can be damn sure that Wolfowitz will spring up in some highly paid job, able to abuse his power all over again.

I’ve a feeling that this is first in a series of “people that have pissed me off”…..

* Jargon Bingo

Got a boss/workmate who uses phrases like "Blue Skies", "Herding Cats", "Ducks in a Line", "Let's Action That!"? Then suffer his dullness no more and liven up your meetings with Jargon Bingo!

Simply ask your fellow sufferers to choose two or three of their favourite pieces of jargon. One you have all chosen you are ready to play "Jargon Bingo"! Once the meeting begins, the fun starts. As each piece of jargon spews forth from the mouth of the Jargon Using Arsehole then cross it off your list! The first to cross all jargon phrases off their list wins! Shouting "Bingo!" is optional.

Disclaimer: The orginators of "Jargon Bingo" take no responsibility for loss of jobs resulting from playing "Jargon Bingo".