It's the Little Differences...

I have to say I am loving it here in Holland. There is so much that appeals to me about the Dutch way of life. On several occasions I have found myself thinking, “If I could get a Babelfish inserted into my ear, I could give living in Holland a go”.

In Hellevoetsluis there is a beautiful marina and it seems that everyone has a boat. Not that I want one, I’d be a liability on a boat. However, I would like to look out of my window every morning to see a vista of beautiful yachts. I’d feel like I was in an F Scott Fitzgerald novel.

Oh, yes the weather is changeable but after a heavy shower or two it always seems to brighten up and you are able to have your dinner outside or squeeze in an hour or so on the beach.

Best of all is the cycling culture. As I said in a previous post, we’ve hired bikes and before the week is out I am going to have thighs of steel. I spent today with Junior Misssy on the bike. I felt so Dutch with my headscarved wee lady on her bike seat behind me as we trundled round the town eating ice-cream and looking for rude signs.

I am also loving the houses. There seems to be a very common style of house that has three floors with big airy rooms and exteriors painted the colour of ice cream. Why can’t we have them at home? They are beautiful.

Annoyingly though, every time I say something along the lines of, “God I love the houses here,” Meeester says, “They remind me of the type of houses in East Kilbride.” (Meeester is from EK). NO! THEY DO NOT! For the love of Pete, East Kilbride is a bum hole of a place polluted by roundabouts and housing estates. And if any of Meeester’s EK dwelling family is reading you can take a shot at me at the Christmas dinner table for what I’ve just said. I’ll stand my ground.

In fact, up until today, I guessed that Meeester is not that impressed by Holland. He said after the whole Arsenaal Pirate theme park debacle,

“That just sums up Holland for me. After this trip I won’t be back”

The Arsenaal was execrable, but to completely dismiss the rest of Holland because of one slip up is unfair. It would be like dissing the whole of the UK because of Grangemouth.

Oh dear….and I’m really liking it here. I was hoping to come back for a weekend to Amsterdam one time. I have a kidless weekend in lieu with my sister in law who is offering to take both beasts. I wanted to do the City Break thing with Meeester to Amsterdam maybe to do the whole Amsterdam Hilton John and Yoko thing. I guess I’m going to have to squeeze in a trip to the ‘Dam whilst we are here, then. Since apparently we’re not coming back.

Then today, Meeester, does a three point turn on his opinion of the Netherlands. He and Indy have been to see the new Harry Potter film in the local cinema and when they return he is beaming.

“The cinema was amazing. You could have a beer whilst watching the film! A beer! You had a little shelf for it on the seat and everything!”, he gushes, “Holland is ACE!”.

Cue conversation with Meeester sounding like Travolta’s Vincent Vega doing the whole Royale with Cheese monologue.

Anyway, now that I’ve finished mocking my other half I must bring you today’s Slightly Rude or Funny Sign That Is In No Way Disrespectful to the Wonderful People of The Netherlands.

Now, we reckon that if you are going to open a lingerie shop then you can opt to accurately describe the sensation you wish to provoke in your desired partner in the naming of that shop. Laydeees and Gennnelmen I give you: