Today I got wolf whistled at.
This took me quite by surprise. When did wolf-whistling come back into vogue?
Imagine the Guardian or the Grazia "What’s Hot, What’s Not List" -type feature.
- Wolf Whistling
- Homo erotic subtexts
- Michael Palin (never sold out, not never)
- Picking your spots
- Mooning out of car windows
- Being polite
- Sapphic undertones
- Ewan MacGregor (Davidoff advert, anyone??**)
- Leaving your spots alone
- Giving the Vs
And it's not as if the guy doing the whistling was a grizzled old Gene Hunt type . He was a youngish bloke. Have I missed a meeting?
The whole wolf whistling thing is not exactly a mating call, though, is it? I mean, I doubt that in the history of man, any wolf whistler has let out the call, to be rewarded with the object of his affection giving him the nod and the wink, Barbara Windsor style.
The actual temptation for a woman on hearing the whistle of the wolf is to take out her gun and fire at the tyres of the van the offending bloke gets into. That’s why Thelma and Louise did such big box office.
So what function does the wolf whistle serve? Intimidation ? Showing off to mates? Is it more of a mateyness call letting the baying band of mates witnessing the event know just what a geezer you are?
Maybe I’m just watching too much Attenborough. All those lizards, turtles, frogs and snakes with clear cut mating signals that let the ladies know what’s on the scaly manbeast’s mind.
Is there a documentary being made by an alien production company somewhere in the Universe right now about earth-dwelling human beings, with a scene in it where a hapless on-heat male gets rejected by an angry female after displaying a ridiculous mating call?
** Sweet Jesus, have you seen it? Words fail me...