The phone rings in House of the Flying Martinis
Indy: Hello?
Meester (phoning home from work): Hello? Is that the police?
Indy: Yes.
Meeester: I want to report that my car has been damaged?
Indy: Do you want me to send the monkey?
Meeester: Yes, but how will I know it’s him? Does he wear a uniform?
Indy: No, but he sometimes likes to wear a bikini.
Meeester: Ok bye
Indy: Bye.
“So, Misssy Martin, when was the point that you knew your son was going to be a surreal esoteric performance artist?”
“The day I met his father”
*Sigh*
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22 comments:
That chimp is the Sherlock Holmes of Africa. He solved the mystery of the hard-boiled ostrich egg.
Looks from the picture like the bikini is chafing a bit - or perhaps it is a 'Stringfellow'. Does he also make a nice cup of PG?
This is a case...for Trunk Monkey!
Intriguing, but obviously I've missed part of the plot somewhere along the line. I shall need to catch up....somehow
Gorilla: Maybe that's where Indy was coming from.
Kate; I LOVED those chimps and that piano.
Mr F: I want one of those!
XUP: When you find out, will you let me know too?
ha ha Indy sounds like a cute little prankster. And that monkey is sexy in a uniform or out of it.
Oh aye, ye had tae post about f*****g monkeys didn't ye.
Emma: What got me about this conversation was that the two of them just were in sync with one another - whatever Meeester's original reason for phoning was forgotten and from my side anyway (Indy's side) it was all done very matter of fact and with a straight face.
Jaggy: Yeah, but monkeys upholding the law, Jaggy. C'mon!
My house suddenly seems normal.
Misssy, Jaggy has had a face like thunder all day because of you.
He's very sensitive about monkeys, didn't you know?!
Loth: Not the first time I've been in receipt of that comment.
Inchy: So what was it that pushed him over the edge- the thought of monkeys in a bikini, monkeys as policemen or that monkey porn comment I made on his blog the other day? (I'm tempted to put the footage up of that, just to see what he does...)
I don't know Misssy, he has some sort of deep-rooted mistrust of monkeys. Maybe he was abducted by some apes as a child, maybe he never saw the funny side of the 80's action show 'BJ and The Bear', or maybe it was having monkey poop thrown at him by a disgruntled primate at Blair Drummond Safari Park a few weeks ago.
I think he saw a little bit of himself in that ape, poor lad.
Inchy: I don't know why but I always think of Bob and Terry from the Likely Lads when you two start up. You decide who is which.
I think I'd have to be Terry Collier, James Bolam's character. He's the slimmer of the two and the one with more personality.
I'll say no more.
I'm not old enough to remember the Likely Lads, unlike Inchy who has all the old black and white ones recorded onto wax cylinder.
...and the prosecution rests, m'lud.
LOL!!!
Hey I finally kicked my blogroll up the arse if ya wanna come see!!!
xx
i got that once when i phoned your house "hello this is the police"
i posted my first blog today :)
:S xx
Suzie: I know that when you say that, that it is the absolute gospel truth. You would have either got that or, "Hello, Menswear Department" or "Hello Tons of Funhouse, Brenda Speaking.."
I'm popping over to your blog...but I hope I'm not shocked!
LOL, nutty comments. My mother sometimes, for no apparent reason, used to answer the phone with 'Catford Steam Laundry'!!!
Great phone conversation.
BT: Your Mum sounds like she should live here.
You have no idea how tempted I have been, since reading this...
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