What is it about folk when they are told they shouldn't do something they do it anyway? The classic is when a waitress puts down a plate in front of you and says, watch out those plates are hot. You have to touch it, don't you? Ouch.
I'm watching with interest today's wee scenario about the EU referendum and thinking about the hot plate touchers out there. The EU came up a lot when we had our Women for Indy stall out in the glorious St Nicholas square in Aberdeen, home of the sandwich stealing kebab fuelled shitehawk, and latterly the indy ref campaigners.
Dog sized Shitehawk of St Nicholas
Two things were guaranteed to be mentioned by folk voting no or leaning towards voting no coming up for a natter. They were:
"What about staying in Europe, they might not let us in, you know! What a disaster that would be!"
"What about the pound, they winna let us use it, you know"
Of course, with the former, it seemed easy. We would just tell them that we had a bigger chance of being out of Europe if we stayed in the UK because there would be a EU referendum and most probably enough of the English population would vote to come out, meaning that we'd all be dragged out too. We said it so much, there were days when I felt like a dolly with a pull string at my back. For info my little internal recording also had:
"It's our BBC too"
"You do know Scotland already has its own NHS"
"It's in rUK's interests to have us use the pound"
"There's no Devomax on the ballot paper, so if you vote No you've no guarantee" (HA!), and
"Watch out Mrs, that seagull's just made off with your kid's ice-cream"
And so it comes to pass. Nicola Sturgeon issues a request to the UK government that all four of our "valued" dysfunctional "family" members have to agree to come out of the EU or it shouldn't happen. It only seems fair given that we are all equal partners and all that. If any of us votes No to leaving Europe, then we stay as we are. Within hours, David Cameron makes himself "absolutely clear" (copyright Anas Sarwar): There is one vote, and if the majority of the UK vote to come out, then all four countries must leave. End of story. Shut yer face. Get back in your box.
So we could have to have new passports after all, you people who had an ill-informed paddy about that one(that was one of erstwhile MP Lib Dem Christine Jardine's favourites as she did the Better Together panel rounds in my constituency) . Oh and no farming subsidies, massively restrictions on trade to European countries, a massively restricted fishing area for our fishing fleets, all our thousands of ex-pats living in Spain and Portugal miserably flooding back home to the rain and the bottom of the housing ladder and a great proportion of our EU workforce having to pack their suitcases leaving skills shortages in their wake.
Next time someone who sounds like they know what they are talking about tells you something, maybe dinnae touch the hot plate anyway?
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